Commentary

Gorilla Glue?

Under the category, “What was she thinking…?

I glanced up from my magazine, drawn by the sound of a woman’s voice speaking sharply to someone just outside the door. A few seconds later the voice walked through the door, directing two young boys – I guessed 4 and 6 – toward the receptionist’s desk.

I returned to the magazine I was reading, but couldn’t help but listen as she loudly announced to the receptionist that her son had cut his forehead on the edge of a screen door.

“How long ago did this happen, Ma’am?” the receptionist asked.

“About half an hour ago. He was bleeding all over the place.”

“Head wounds will do that, Ma’am.”

I looked around until I found the victim. A jagged red line ran vertically on his forehead from the hairline of his crew cut almost to his eyebrow. Some kind of ointment had been applied that made his skin glisten along both sides of the gash.

“Have you treated it in any way?” the receptionist asked.

“Yep. I washed it and put super glue on it to stop the bleeding.”

I heard the receptionist’s sharp intake of breath, then nothing. I could feel her searching for words as a few seconds slowly ticked off the clock.

“Well, not really super glue,” the mother said. “Gorilla Glue. It’s supposed to be even stronger.”

I looked up and smiled as I watched the receptionist try to keep a straight face and fail.

“Yeah. I know,” the mother said. “I called a friend of mine who’s a pediatrician. She said Gorilla Glue probably wasn’t a very good idea.”

I bit my lip as the receptionist stared at the mother, her disbelief clearly showing on her face. She cleared her throat.

“Please have a seat ma’am. Someone will be with you shortly.”

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